Lowland Fling

P1130499Just when we thought we wouldn’t make it back to Edinburgh this year, our Facebook friend, Julie, invited us to do a book signing and launch of the The Malignant Dead in Falkirk on Halloween, as part of Callendar Square shopping centre’s Holistic Halloween fair. Trinity Moon in the shopping centre stock our books. You know what’s close to Falkirk? Edinburgh. So we booked a trip and took our mates Tom and Amy with us. They’ve never been to Edinburgh. Our usual Edinburgh buddy, Neen, is working on Galavant and couldn’t come.

Cat hijacking Thunderbird 2

Cat hijacking Thunderbird 2

Our trip began unusually peacefully. Cardiff airport was dead. Zombie apocalypse dead. We half expected to see mangled corpses riding on the baggage carousel and getting patted down at security. We wandered over to the baggage check in and weighed our case – .6kg over. Luckily, Tom’s bag had 10kg to spare so 4 copies of Soul Asylum and our batteries hitched a ride in his bag. It turned out to be a self serve bag check in. So much better! And we didn’t argue with it like we do with supermarket machines. Although Cat failed putting the luggage tag on by not watching the on screen instructions. Then we went upstairs and found a ride on Thunderbird 2 for photos. You know your holiday is off to a good start when your first photo is you riding a kids’ Thunderbird. Got through security no problem. What is this witchcraft? Again, hardly anyone there. We were suspicious. Did everyone else know something we didn’t? Then we had 2 hours til the flight. So we spent it wisely – eating shortbread, drinking Red Bull and bitching about how we couldn’t get on the free Wi-Fi.

Lynx Thunderbirds are go!

Lynx Thunderbirds are go!

We were meant to board at 5:30 but didn’t get called til 6. Most of the flights were to Amsterdam. Before one D&D session, our group spent a while discussing taking a group holiday to Amsterdam, hiring prostitutes and taking them for a lovely day out to the funfair. And maybe getting them to be non-playing characters in our latest campaign. Had Cardiff airport overheard this? Were they trying to make this a reality? On board the plane, we ruined the air steward’s safety routine. That’s a first for us, but we think it’s a fine achievement. During the safety demonstration, he tripped when turning around to demonstrate how to tie on the lifejacket. Cat & Tom laughed then Cat said he nearly gave us a totally different demonstration. He tried really hard not to laugh, but we were determined to break him. The more he fought it, the redder he became. Then when it came to demonstrating blowing into the tube on the life jacket, he wouldn’t look Cat in the eye and then he laughed. Us 1 air steward 0. They are human after all.

Edinburgh AirportWe landed earlier then expected then accidentally went out through the back of the airport. But we got a great photo opportunity with us each standing in a giant letter of the Edinburgh sign. Couldn’t find the air link bus. We were certain they were always right outside the airport. They are. Out the front. We found a tram ticket place. £8 each return. We couldn’t remember how much the bus was and went looking for it. Turned out we’d come out the wrong exit of the airport so we had to walk back. Found the bus. £7.50 each. And there were loads of roadworks, which we probably would’ve avoided with the tram. We couldn’t lug our case up the stairs, so we stayed down while Tom and Amy went up. A Canadian guy invited one of us to sit by him and let Lynx put her bag on his lap while she squeezed in. That’s gentlemanly behaviour you don’t see every day, especially as her case weighed 13kg. Cat rode on her suitcase. Hey, we travel in style.Edinburgh airport

Got in to Edinburgh past 8:30. Then walked up Cockburn Street, turned right onto the Royal Mile and kept going. We knew exactly where we were going! We know Edinburgh well. We laughed in the face of maps! When we got to George IV, we realised we’d walked too far and had to turn around. Tom brought a map up on his phone. We ended up in Bells Wynd, which is basically like an alley and a guy asked if we needed help.

Cockburn Street

Cockburn Street

He thought Tron Square was slightly back the way we’d come. We got the tablet out and found the directions the apartment owner, Wendy gave us. Then Lynx went one way and Tom went another, leaving Cat and Amy with the luggage and feeling like every horror cliche was being used: splitting up, random person appearing to be helpful but isn’t, railings clanging, place that doesn’t exist… All we needed was lusty teens and the slaughter would begin. But luckily Tom found the apartment. It was probably too cold for teens to be cavorting outside.

our apartment

our apartment

The apartment was lovely. It had one bedroom and a sofa bed. And it was in the perfect location for all the places we wanted to visit. In our usual style, we dumped our stuff then headed out. We like to hit the ground running on holiday and don’t stop until we’re on the plane home. Turned out, we’d walked right past Old Assembly Close, which takes us directly to the apartment. It even has ‘Tron Square’ with an arrow pointing! Fail. We went to Frankenstein’s but it was absolutely packed, so we went to Nando’s instead. Going to Frankenstein’s on our first night is a tradition! Way to ruin our tradition, hen and stag parties 😦 A curse on both your houses! May your marriage fail miserably 😉

St Giles Cathedral

St Giles cathedral


  1. As usual enjoyed reading about your travels especially to Edinburgh as it’s ages since I’ve been there!

    • Thanks! We love Edinburgh so much. It felt like home the moment we first visited three years ago. We never get bored of it.

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