My So-Called Christmas Carol

Christmas at Ravens Retreat is usually banned. We don our Bah-Humbug hats, avoid the family and generally make an effort to do the most un-Christmassy thing we can think of. But this year, we’ve got a wonderful Christmas treat for you – the fabulous Tamsyn Murray, the author of the Afterlife series for teens and the stunt bunny series for children. No, we haven’t wrapped her up and stashed her under your trees, but we have given her the keys to Ravens Retreat. We are very excited as we’ve been fans since we picked up My So-Called Afterlife in our local bookshop. She’s just released her latest book in the Afterlife series, My So-Called Christmas Carol. And it’s brilliant. Scrooge has been replaced by a purple-haired, pierced medium, Elvira, who is hilarious. So to celebrate, Tamsym has written her vision of a Christmas Yet to Come. She also has a story for the Christmas Present on her blog here – We’ll leave you enjoy it while we dig out our Bah-Humbug hats. They’re around here somewhere…

Tamsyn MurrayChristmas Yet To Come

I wonder what Christmas will be like in the future?  Will it be a constant flurry of short visits, as we beam to each other’s houses a la Star Trek? Or will we spend days sitting in slow-moving traffic to reach our destinations, because there are more vehicles than people out there? Or will everyone spend their time lurching from one empty, smouldering house to another, in a constant quest for the few remaining braaaiinsssss?

Personally, I intend to be as unreasonable as possible in my old age. I’m going to demand everyone always comes to me for Christmas, and throw a quavery, pity-inducing monster strop if any of my relatives dare to suggest that, actually, they quite fancied going skiing this year. None of the gifts I receive will be good enough and I’ll steal anything I like the look of. Someone else will do the cooking; I will, of course, complain bitterly that the turkey is dry, the sprouts are too wet and the gravy is too thick\thin\lumpy\meaty. After dinner, I will pretend to sleep and snore so loudly that no one can concentrate on the holographic film and then I’ll insist everyone plays poker, which I’ll win by cheating outrageously. I may or may not fart continuously throughout the day – I haven’t decided yet, although I realise it may not be up to me at that age. By the end of the day, I will be loudly drunken and pour withering scorn upon anyone within earshot, before kicking everyone out and going to bed.

Hang on, this sounds like fun. Maybe I should make this Christmas Present…where are those playing cards?

Here’s our review of My So-Called Christmas Carol – this is a modern version of A Christmas Carol but with an embittered purple-haired, pierced psychic, Elvira as Scrooge. We loved Elvira. She was a fantastic character and her narrative was hilarious. We particularly liked the bit where she wanted to strangle carollers with their ear muffs. Who hasn’t wanted to do that? We also loved the bit where she’s shown her Christmas past and her response is “breaking news, I was a child once.” A particularly nice touch was having Lucy from My So-Called Afterlife and Owen from My So-Called Phantom Love Life returning as the ghosts of Christmas present and Christmas yet to come. The ending was satisfying without being sentimental and we liked the way the ending was left open, rather than finishing with the typical ‘happily ever after’, which would’ve done a disservice to Elvira’s character.

My So-called Christmas Carol

We strongly recommend you follow Tamsyn on Twitter – @TamsynTweetie she’s hilarious and it’s refreshing for us to find someone whose car breaks down more than ours, which is nice 😀

and follow her blog –

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