The end. Or is it?

Hey healthy, happy brains! Scott here! Hope you’re all keeping your brains inspired, creative and best of all, delicious. Right whilst my Necromancers are distracted listening to My Chemical Romance’s Danger Days album which they bought this morning, I’ve comandeered their blog. I’ve been away for far too long. Unfortunately being a zombie means my fingers have lost some dexterity so when they hog tie me and dump me in my freezer, I can’t escape. I’m formulating a plan to eat their brains. Gotta plan a really nice meal that will do their brains justice. They tell me they’ve finished the first redraft of my novel and have written four alternative endings. See at the end Tyler’s attacked. Save your tears. He had it coming. Yes he’s my best mate but he refuses to let me eat his brain. He even wrote it into his will. I told him a will written on the inside of a Cheerios packet wasn’t legally binding but he’d even convinced two people to sign as witnesses.

Anyhoo, the endings are all to do with what happens to Tyler after the attack. The plan is to give the endings to their mate Dave, who Tyler’s based on and ask him to pick his favourite. But seeing as Dave and Tyler are practically the same person (both being Chairman of the Apathy Committee) I’ll probably die of boredom waiting. And as my first death was very unglamorous and frankly embarrassing, dying of boredom isn’t the way I plan to go. My Necromancers have also being writing insert chapters, about half a page long to put between chapters. These follow different minor characters who reappear throughout the book. My Necromancers felt these characters needed more page time but as I’m the one telling the story you don’t get to know them very well. I’m ashamed to admit I threw a princess style tantrum over this. It’s MY freakin’ book! I don’t WANT to share it with these nobodies! I don’t care that they don’t get much page time. The book is Scott the Zombie, not Scott the Zombie and others. They should get their own freakin’ books!

All this talk about brains has made me hungry. Hmm. *sniffing enthusiastically* there’s a jogger approaching. Let me just open the window, get a better sniff. Oh yeah. He’s in a band. I could be the first zombie rock star! I’ll just sneak out and…stop struggling! I’ll chew my way into you if I have to, you wonderful delicious talented brain! Ooh yeah, that’s a nice juicy one. I think I’ll turn you into Scott’s Shepherd’s Surprise. Mmmmmmm.